Skip to main content

How to Love Yourself

A lot of people are struggling with a low self esteem, myself included. I still struggle with it. Maybe you recognize yourself in this; I don’t look that good, I have some flaws or I can’t do this huge project I want to do. Maybe you don’t look after yourself while you look after everyone else.
My views lately, have changed on loving yourself and I increased my self confidence with some exercises. But also by reading about this subject. there is not a lot concrete studies done on this subject. So, you have got to find your own way in this (and maybe do some research yourself). Although, in this article I will give you a start with some exercise and some wise words.

The mirror exercise

Firstly, a exercise that helps a lot when you feel down about yourself. It will give, at least in my opinion, a feeling that you are worth it. Get towards a mirror up close to your face. Really look towards your skin. Take yourself in. And then, say out loud; ‘I love and accept exactly how you are’. Twenty times. Out loud. In the moment you might have troubles saying it. Maybe you hesitated. But once you are used to it. You see no point into hesitating; you are wonderful.

Love is our natural state of being

Love yourself no matter what. So, no ‘if’. For instance, If I am successful I will love myself. Just love yourself and let go of every string attached to it. Leave your luggage. Because our natural state of being is loving.

Afbeeldingsresultaat voor self esteem

Focus on now

If you focus on now. And see what you already have become. You will feel more grateful to be yourself. For instance, I finish twenty-five books already this year. Which made me realize that I came from far. Maybe you finished a class or did that thing you always wanted to do. Be happy about the things you already have accomplished. Maybe even make a list of it because you won’t remember as much as you think you do ;)

Avoid perfectionism

Some people only want the best results and don’t settle for less. If you are one of these people. Take this advice carefully: Shift your focus from the final product to the required work that you need to do. Than, do the required work with all joy. You will find


The next exercise/ habit will help you get increase your self esteem through writing. Take a notebook or paper and write the things you really like about yourself. And be specific. Afterwards, reflect on them and read them out loud. This will help you greatly :)

Stop comparing

Comparing yourself to other will lower yourself esteem. So, stop it. Comparing is never fair. We all came from another way to become who we are right now. For example, when I am in the gym seeing all these dudes lifting heavy weights. I sometimes do compare me with them. And that’s when I realize that it is not fair at all, they have come from a long way to become who they are. Moreover, I will become one of them, one day (I hope so). In conclusion, comparing is not a fair fight. Stop it.
Here is a video that helps you with this.

To sum it up:
1. Use the mirror exercise
2. Leave your luggage behind
3. Focus on the present
4. Don’t be perfect (no one ever will be perfect in everybody’s eyes, let it be)
5. Write things you like about yourself down
6. Stop with comparing yourself with other’s

That’s it for today! Hope you liked this article. You can subscribe above, and you can share it with your friends ;)

Ingmar Heikens


  1. let it bee let it beeeee let it beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Recontextualization; a change in framing

One day, about two or three years ago, my little brother stole my bar of chocolate. I was mad and lost my respect towards him. Later on that day I asked ‘Why did you steal my bar of chocolate?”. He said “Because it is mine”. I said “No it isn’t”. “Yes it is” he kept saying. Then my mom came in the room and asked why I didn’t eat my chocolate bar. My perspective changed; I couldn’t find my bar and I said that he stole it, which he didn’t. My facts didn’t changed but the way I looked at it did. This is called recontextualization.

The importance of Recontextualization

When we get the inside in this phenomena we learn how we can change or perspectives. It also opens up the possibility of radically changing your understanding of a situation or facts without changing the facts. In my opinion, reality can hide the things that are in our reach. It helps us to put the right things in the proper context. Another example, ‘a man is jumping’. Think for a second about what you are picturing before …

Psychological evolution; the way people work

Hey there! Today we are going to discuss spiral dynamics. What are they? And how can we use it in our daily life? For this blog post I studied several lectures and videos to get to know this subject. And I found it so interesting that I want to share it with you guys. It is about the psychological evolution of thinking. How we think but also our perspectives which change through out our lives. Which will help you to find your blind spots. Which you don’t want to see. But once you see them you will see the need to develop in those blind spots. Besides that, it will help you to see the world from all life perspectives. You will get to know how to talk to certain groups of people. And it will be a really open-minded experience once you understand this concept developed by Clare Graves. Let’s dive into the concept!

Before I am explaining all levels I am going to let you know how I am going to do that. Each color is a level of a perspective on life. The first three aren’t really relevant be…

Specialize your knowledge

I am back again with another post. In this post I will describe why and how you can specialize your knowledge. Most people, are mistaken by learning in several topics, in my opinion. We were taught on school to think wide on what you want to do. And we get all those subjects, about twelve on my high-school. In that order, we get used to think that having a general knowledge is what we need. But is the opposite what makes you rich and smart.

Why? Having a specialize knowledge, in one topic is more demand for. It shows the employer that you have build up a good self-discipline. Moreover, nowadays character counts more than a long CV list. If you have a subject where your passion lies, why not specialize in it? It will only be beneficial to you ;)

How? There are multiple good resources to gain knowledge about your topic;
Your own experience and studiesUniversities Public libraries and the InternetSpecial courses (part time or online)
With those resources and your ambition to learn more and …